I knew from the moment she opened her eyes this morning that Daisy was in a foul mood. She stomped out of her bedroom and not only did her nappy leak onto her own bed, due to me not being quick enough to steer her from my bed she managed to wet that as well. So by 6am this morning there were two lots of washing in.
Once downstairs her mood didn’t lighten. She was on a mission to destroy, swiping at anything in reach, including me. I served her breakfast hoping that would appease her but she just threw my offerings across the kitchen and then pointed and moaned a really annoying moan until I picked it all up…….toast, marmite side down!
Dressing was a staged process, one piece at a time, each removed several times until she knew I’d eventually win. Every minute of this morning was a battle, she wanted my head on a stick and me hers.
Is it wrong to hate your child sometimes? I did today but then I noticed her clenching her fist tight and punching her head and realised she may be suffering, so my feelings of being a crap mum surfaced again, I’m trying my best to help her but I’m failing miserably as I can’t seem to keep her happy.
Daisy is in respite tonight. I would normally feel guilt, but just for tonight I’m going to enjoy the peace; I’d considerd drinking myself into a coma but I’m too old to cope with the morning after hangover, so it’s off to bed with a glass of water, tv on silent and a book………..living the dream me!